CHAPTER TEN

Tennant

 “You really don’t have to knock,” Mads informed me after opening the door.

I threw myself at him, plastering my lips to his, my bag hitting the floor with a dull whump as we staggered into the nearest wall. The door creaked shut.

Mads hefted me up tighter to him. “That was quite the greeting.”

“I told them,” I gasped, the kiss robbing me of breath.

He looked at me questioningly, but kept me pressed to him, his hands resting on my hips.

“My parents. I told them I was gay and they were totally okay with it!”

“Wow.” His mouth hung open a bit. “That’s… wow. Did you tell them about us?”

“No. Well, not really. I said there was someone, but I didn’t mention names.” His exhalation was huge. “I wouldn’t throw you under the bus like that. You mean too much to me.”

Mads buried his face in my neck, tasted the skin under my ear, then pulled back so that he could cup my face. He spent a whole minute just looking at me. My hands moved up and down his arms.

“I’d really like to make love to you”

“I’d really like to be inside you.”

My first thought was to pump the air and hoot, “Finally!” I bit that reaction back.

“I would love that so much.”

Mads picked up my bag, then offered me his hand. For some reason, after all the time spent pitching myself around because of lack of sex, now that he was waiting for me to take his hand to actually go have sex, I was feeling stupid and shy.

He arched a brow. “If you’re not ready, Ten, that’s fine.”

“No, I’m ready.” I placed my hand in his. My heart started dancing irregularly. “Are you kidding? I’ve been ready for weeks. Months.”

“There’s a difference between being physically ready and mentally ready.” We stood in his tidy living room—which had all kinds of furnishings—holding hands while he tried to feel me out. “Are you sure you’re mentally ready?”

“I’m sure.” I stepped up to him and kissed him with all I had, our clasped hands pinned between his chest and mine. When we broke apart, I found his gaze resting on me. “I’m so sure. I want you inside me.”

“Dear God, Tennant.”

He sighed, took a light kiss, then led me to his bedroom. It was a nice room. Filled with a dresser and a bed. I’d been in it at least two dozen times, but now that we were getting down to more than humping each other or touching each other’s dicks through our underwear, the room seemed bigger, the bed enormous. Hell, my lover suddenly seemed to have grown a foot or two.

“You look like you’re ready to run,” he said.

“I’m feeling stupid and small.”

He released my hand, then placed my overnight bag beside the light oak dresser.

“Okay, so I’ve sucked lots of dick, right?” My nerves were jangling. Mads nodded. “So, I’m good with that. But the other stuff…”

“Tennant, there’s no rule that says we have to have anal sex.”

“No, see, I want to, but the last time it kind of went badly. It hurt, and he was a fumbling moron like I was. See, I want this to be perfect for you.”

“And it will be. Why don’t we just see where our passion takes us?” He pulled off his Railers T-shirt and let it drop to the floor, then he unzipped the old jeans he’d been wearing. They slipped down to his ankles, along with his boxers. Dear God, there was so much Mads. His body was hard and lean, bigger than mine in just about every way. He let me look at him for as long as I needed.

I rushed to peel off my clothes, then felt a little inadequate in comparison to him. His cock was so rugged and male. Thick and long and uncut, hard, and weepy with fat veins. And then there was mine, which up to that point I’d thought was pretty damn impressive.

“By God, you are so beautiful,” he said, which made me flush. “Look at that. I didn’t think Tennant Rowe knew how to blush. It looks good on you.”

My feelings were all over the place. I suddenly felt like a kid. Like some stupid kid who was finally where he wanted to be and was just realizing that he was in over his head.

“Can you come touch me, please?” I asked, hoping that wasn’t too weak a request.

“I’d love to.” He padded over to me, his gaze staying with mine. “Why don’t you tell me what you want, Tennant?”

“You,” I managed to croak, my fingertips crying out to reach out and touch him. “I want you to touch me everywhere. Kiss me everywhere. Then I want you inside me.”

“Are you sure?”

Mads took that last step—the one that pressed his nude body to mine. His prick nestled against mine. I whimpered a bit. He slid a hand around me, pulled me flush to him, and lowered his head to kiss my neck. My head fell back, my eyes slid shut, and my body became his to do with as he wanted.

“Are you sure, Tennant?”

“Yes, yes, I’m sure.”

He put a few soft bites along my throat, then eased me back onto the bed, his weight settling on top of me. He felt perfect. Strong and long, firm with sharp planes and rolling muscles under my fingers. I wrapped around him like one of those flowery, clingy vines Mom planted by the lamp post in the back yard. Mads kissed me. I blossomed under his mouth and hands. All this time I’d thought I was so experienced and such a top-notch lover, but Mads showed me that making love to someone was vastly different from simply fucking someone.

He was so gentle, so patient, easing me into lying back in his arms as he stroked me and petted me, kissed my chest and toyed with my ass.

“If you want me to stop, just say so,” he repeated while working me into a lather. By the time he was pressing a finger into me, I was beyond speech. Animalistic sounds and grunts were all that came out of me. He worked that slippery finger in while dropping kisses along my cheek and eye. “How are you?”

“Great. Ah, man, that is amazing.” I groaned, then shivered, my fingers twisted in the bedding.

“Good, good.” He stole a kiss, then pulled that finger out. I arched up, eager for more. “This is going to be even better.” He pushed two fingers in, then began rotating them, pressing them deep, scissoring them, and bumping my prostate. “Shhh, shhh,” he whispered as I thrashed around wildly, my balls tightening up. The fingering stalled as I slithered back from the edge.

“I’m so close, Mads… so close. I want to come with you inside me…”

“Let’s take our time.”

“Seriously, I’m hearing that now?”

He chuckled, kissed me lightly, then licked and nibbled his way down to my cock. Arm over my stomach, he sucked me deeply into his mouth while cupping my balls. I bucked up, eager to get all of myself down his throat. He pressed my ass back onto the bed, then started sucking hard and fast. His tongue swirled over the tip, then he took me deep. There was no holding back. No way could I stop the orgasm that ran me over. Mads let the head of my cock rest on his tongue, his fingers fisted at the base. I pounded on the mattress. He lapped up every droplet that rested on his lips and fingers.

“You’re tastier than I imagined,” he growled while giving my cock a final stroke.

I was still quaking when he shifted around, rolling away from me. I touched him all over. His back, his arms, his hip, his stomach. Sitting up, I wiggled closer to his back, rubbing my hands over his shoulders while kissing the nape of his thick neck. His skin broke into gooseflesh, which made me smile. When he moved to face me, I skittered back onto the bed, my gaze dropping to his latex-covered cock. When I reached for him, he didn’t stop me. His prick was smooth and hard in my hand. I fell onto my back, guiding him up and over me, squeezing my fingers tightly around him.

Mads settled between my legs, easing my thighs up until they rested on my chest. All the while his eyes glowed like he’d been given a rare prize or something.

“Are you sure about this?” His grip on my knees was firm but not painful.

I nodded as I worked to calm my breathing a little. “Mads, I swear I’m fine. If you pull back now, I’ll go freaking insane. Please, I want you in me. Please.

He leaned down to get a kiss, the tip of him nudging at my opening. “Relax, Ten,” he purred before pushing his cock in a bit.

The burn was familiar. I winced.

He paused. “You okay? Any time this gets to be too much, say so.”

“More,” I huffed, and dug at his biceps.

He gave me more and even more, inch by inch, easing me into the possession, giving my body time to stretch and adjust.

“I can’t breathe,” I panted when he leaned in to my legs. “Fuck, it’s…”

“Yes, it really is.” He flicked his hips quickly. I bowed up off the bed. “You good?”

“Oh, fuck yes,” I replied, my fingers slipping along the surface of his sweaty skin. “Give me more, Mads.”

We found a rhythm. It was tentative at first, easy. Then it increased, picking up speed. I held on to his arms, my gaze pinned to Mads as he filled me then withdrew, each stroke moving me across the bed an inch or so. I asked him for more again. He gave me more speed, more depth, more gyrating hip action. My head slid off the side of the mattress. He yanked me back onto the bed without losing his pace. My legs were cramping. The bed seconded our tempo, hitting the wall with a rapid bang-bang-bang.

“Ten, shit, Ten,” he growled.

I wrapped my fingers around his forearms as he came. He dug into the mattress with his knees, pushing himself up and deeper on the come stroke. His muscles constricted, his jaw locked, and his cock kicked deep inside me. He was the most the stunning man I’d ever seen, and that was all I could think as I was coming.

He was beautiful. And he was mine.

Clawing like a cat, I writhed under him, his depth painful and pleasurable at the same time.

“Sorry, shit… sorry, Ten,” he huffed, and eased out of me. My leg muscles tightened up. I rolled to my side to work the cramps out of my thighs. “I’m sorry.” He ran a hand over my side then up my back.

“No, it’s good, it’s just thigh cramps.” I groaned.

He lay down behind me, pulled me close to him, and licked the tattoo on the back of my neck. His hands traveled down my side to my hip and then to my thigh. His fingers worked the oxygen-starved muscles. I moaned and sighed as the cramps eased up.

“You okay now?” His words were hot little puffs on my inkwork. I turned to pudding, melting back into him as he massaged my thigh. “Are you sure it was just cramps?”

“Yeah, it was just cramps. You were super gentle.”

I rolled my head to the left and got a sloppy kiss. His hand came up to rest on my stomach as his tongue danced over mine. We lay there for a long time, kissing, and touching. I rolled over to face him.

“That was worth the wait.”

“Glad to hear it. I have to take care of this condom.”

He pressed a kiss to my forehead, then slipped from the knotted bedding. I thought about getting up to get a drink, but my legs ached and my ass was tender. No way was I letting him see me gimping around, so I pulled the coverlet up and closed my eyes, inhaling the scent of me, Mads, and sex on the air.

“Hey, here.”

I swam through the fog of post-sex sleep. Mads was sitting beside me on the bed with a bottle of spring water and wearing a smug smile.

“Drink all of it.”

I sat up. The cover slithered down my chest and puddled on my lap.

“Thanks.”

“Do you need anything else?” He was so attentive. It was so cute. I shook my head while I sucked down twenty ounces. “I have all kinds of food.”

I tossed the empty bottle onto the floor and reached for him, my hand coming to rest on his shoulder. I pulled his mouth to mine.

“I want more of you,” I told him, gave him a shove that sent him tumbling back to the mattress, then eyed his limp cock hungrily. “Yeah, more of you will do just fine.”

Lucky me, he was willing to give me all the Mads I could handle.

 

* * * * *

 

The inside of Mads’ fridge looked like my parents’. It was packed full of food. Good food. Milk, eggs, fruit, and fresh vegetables. Yogurt and juice bottles. Sports drinks and bottled water with added vitamins and minerals. So the total opposite of my fridge, which had half a pizza still in the box, a jug with an inch of sour milk in the bottom, and a bottle of ketchup. Oh yeah, and a six-pack of Miller Lite that now held only one unopened bottle. I really needed to do some shopping.

My stomach snarled, reminding me of the fact that I had expended some major energy last night. I grabbed the bottle of orange juice and a container of strawberries, then hip-checked the door closed. Knowing I had also lost some fluid in Mads’ bed, I opened the carton and took a long drink. It was unsweetened and pulpy, the fleshy bits of orange sticking to my teeth. I needed a toothbrush and shower in the worst way. A grumble from my gut reminded me that food was number one on the priority list.

I rummaged around in his cupboards, sipping OJ all the while, until I found a bowl. The silence of his place started to wear on my nerves, so I pulled my phone out of the back pocket of my jeans, opened Spotify, and found a playlist that appealed. Now that I had some Glass Animals playing, I could think better. Growing up in a house with three boys meant noise. Lots of noise and lots of junk scattered around. Places like this, all soundproofed and tidy, set me on edge.

The tiles were cool under my bare feet as I padded to the sink and washed the fat, red berries by holding the container under the flow of water. Mom always said to wash your fruit, but a rinse should suffice. I was too hungry to dick around with anything else. I plucked a huge strawberry out and bit it off by the leafy stem. The berry was ripe, filled with sweet red juice that coated my tongue.

“Oh man,” I sighed, then went for another.

I’d polished off about a third of the container when his arms curled around my middle, startling me so badly I fumbled the berry that was close to my mouth. Mads ran his tongue over my tattoo, sending a spear of red-hot lust to my groin. His hands flattened over my bare stomach. I smiled as he rubbed a small circle over my abdomen.

“What is this shit playing on your phone?”

“Seriously? You don’t know Glass Animals?”

I looked back to find his blue eyes on me. I held up a berry for him to eat over my shoulder. His teeth were white and even as he gently bit the fruit. Juice ran over my fingers, dripping to the bare skin of my shoulder. I dropped the stem. It rolled down my chest. He ran the tip of his tongue over my fingertips, and then sucked my index finger into his mouth. My cock began to plump up. Between his sucking on my finger and his hands roaming down into the waistband of my jeans, I was pretty much a goner.

“And you have a Pokémon tattoo on the back of your neck.”

“That’s your comeback for everything. It’s lame and old, like you.” I leaned back into him, his erection pressing against my ass. “Which tastes better? My fingers or my neck?”

“Are you being coy, Tennant?”

I shrugged, since I wasn’t sure what being coy really meant.

“I haven’t found a part of you that tastes bad yet.”

That was when I turned around in his arms, shoved my fingers into his short blond hair, and kissed him as deeply as I could. His tongue slipped over mine. He pushed his hand down into my jeans, his fingers skimming over the tender head of my cock. A rolling shudder broke free, branching out from my core to my arms, legs, hands, and feet. When his fingers coiled around my cock, I gasped, breaking the wet seal of our lips.

“I thought a dude your age would need a day or two to recover… Ah man, that is so good.” He stroked me from base to tip while nipping along my jaw line. His tongue ran up over my cheek.

“You’ve got one hell of a beard for a kid your age,” he purred, then pressed a soft kiss to the corner of my eye. Keeping upright was growing tricky. My knees felt soft.

“I’m not a kid,” I reminded him with more than a little attitude. He pulled back an inch or so and thumbed the head of my cock. A ragged breath fluttered over my lips.

“No, you are certainly not a kid. Sorry for that.”

He dipped into my mouth gently, teasing me with flicks of his tongue along the edge of my teeth, all the while working my cock with a tight fist. Just as I was falling into the pace of his strokes, he stopped. Once his hand was out of my jeans, he found my fly.

“Not a kid at all,” he stated before freeing my cock and dropping to his knees in front of me.

“Oh shit,” I gasped when he sucked me into his mouth.

Fingers seeking purchase, I found the edge of the counter after knocking the container of strawberries to the floor. Mads closed his eyes and went deep, slipping my cock down his throat as his fingers held my ass cheeks. My jeans lingered around my knees. He seemed content to leave them there, his head bobbing as he twisted and twirled his tongue along the bottom of my cock. The man knew how to give head. Like, he had escort skills, or what I assumed an escort would know. I’d never used one. If I had, he’d have looked just like Mads, who was in control of his maturity and sexual experience. He worked it so well…

“Are you close?”

I grunted and thrust, the rasp of his teeth along my cock painful but not enough to pull me back from the brink. Mads cupped my balls, squeezed firmly, then went back down on me. One hand on my stomach to keep me in place, he sucked and clasped, sucked and clasped, until I blew apart. My head kicked back violently, his name falling out of me as I came. He swallowed rapidly, humming in pleasure as I bucked and moaned.

“Oh, oh, oh shit, shit.” My balls contracted in his grip.

Mads licked me clean, then got to his feet. His eyes were like pools of blue fire.

“You want me to suck you off?” I asked.

“No, I want you to pick up the berries, wash them off, and bring them back to bed.” He padded off, giving me a great view of his tight ass and corded thighs.

I pulled up my jeans, zipped, and scooped up and washed strawberries as fast as I could. I ran to the bedroom, a dripping plastic container full of freshly rinsed berries in my hand. Mads was spread out across his bed, filling the thing with hard muscle, long limbs, and a thick, hard cock and heavy balls. I couldn’t tear my gaze from his prick. You’d think I would have gotten enough of him last night, but that didn’t seem to be the case.

“Good man. Now bring them over here.” He patted the mattress beside him, his lush mouth quirked up into a wicked smile.

“What are we going to do with them?” I wasn’t sure why I even cared. Right then, I couldn’t think of anything he could do with a berry that I’d protest him doing.

“Nothing that you won’t love.”

“Yeah?”

“Yeah. Now bring them over here and lie down with me.”

I crossed the room, kicked the knotted covers on the floor aside, and placed one knee then the other onto the mattress. The bottom sheet was all screwed up, baring the far corner of the mattress by Mads’ head. He took the container, ignoring the droplets of water falling onto the sheet and his stomach. I couldn’t ignore them, though. I bent down and lapped them off, enjoying the feel of his skin twitching as my tongue roamed over it.

“Hold that over your abs,” I told him, and he did. “Shake it.”

Water escaped through the air holes, dotting his abdomen. I threw an arm over his chest, then went to work, licking and chasing each drop of water. He made deep, heady noises as I cleaned him up. I’d almost worked my way to his cock when his fingers slid into my hair and pulled me gently upward.

“Once you get something in your mind…”

He flipped the container open and plucked out a fat berry. I tossed a leg over him and seated myself on his thighs. My gaze fell to his cock.

“Hey,” he called, and I glanced up at him. “My eyes are up here,” he teased, then fed me the berry. I chewed and swallowed.

“But your dick is here.” I ran the back of a finger over the velvety shaft. “And I’m much more interested in your dick than your eyes at the moment. Sorry. Totally shallow, I know.”

“Totally male.”

He chuckled before choosing another berry. This one he placed on his chest, taking time to lay it just so that it didn’t roll off his nipple. I liked this game already. I leaned over him, trapping that fat, hot cock of his between us, then lifted the strawberry from his skin with my tongue, making sure I got a nice lap of his tight little nipple as I did. He sighed roughly. Another berry came to rest on his other nipple. A smaller one. I grabbed that one with my teeth, chewed quickly, swallowed, then flicked his nipple with the tip of my tongue. My cock was slowly fattening up. Mads’ prick was like a branding iron pushed into my belly.

“Can you fuck me again?” I asked while mouthing his nipple.

“Patience,” he said.

He gave me a soft berry to focus on. It was super ripe. I smashed it against the roof of my mouth. He reached for me, pulled me down, and licked at my closed mouth, seeking entrance. I opened for him, shared the juice and the flesh, the sticky sweetness, then smeared it all over his lips and chin with my tongue. His hold on the back of my head grew firmer as we sucked on each other’s lips and tongues. Then he rolled me onto my back.

“Fuck, yeah,” I groaned, eager as hell to get him inside me. I brought up my legs, but he pushed them back down.

“Patience,” he said yet again, lowering himself over me, stealing a kiss as he pumped his cock against my ass.

“Fucker,” I growled playfully. “Tell a man to be patient, then you perpetrate that kind of tease?”

“You need to learn that it’s not always about shoving your dick into the first available orifice.” He ran rough palms up over my arms, pinning my hands by the headboard, all while trailing kisses along my jaw.

“It kind of is.” I arched up, crazy mad to get him buried inside me again. He held me down, licked and sucked, nibbled and gnawed on my throat and mouth until I thought I’d go insane. “Mads, come on! Fuck’s sake, I’m dying here.”

“Tennant, you already came once. You’ll be fine.”

Oh, right. I had blown a wad back in the kitchen. That was where the berries had come from. And Mads hadn’t come yet this morning. Dude must have a killer case of blue balls.

“Just enjoy the play.”

“Right, enjoy the play.”

I wiggled under him, hoping to entice him to penetrate me. I mean, his cock was resting right against my ass. One flick and he’d be inside me. He released my wrists and sat back, rolling his hips so that his prick now lay by the base of my cock. I looked down to see his cock resting on the dark curls, a sparkling drip of precum leaking from him.

“Mads, let me get to your dick,” I begged, but no, the shit grabbed the stupid berries and picked another ripe one from the container.

“You know what I’m going to do with this?”

“Make a fruit frappe?” I reached for his cock. He gently slapped my hand to the side.

“No, I’m going to do this with it.”

He smashed the fruit against my chest, smearing the pulp into the dark circlet of my left nipple. Then he sucked it clean. He suckled hard, pulling the little bud into his mouth, then grazing it with his sharp teeth. I yelped in pleasure, dug my heels into the bedding, and grasped at his bare back.

“Want me to do it to the other one?”

“Yes, yes, shit yes.” The words exploded out of me in brisk, short pants.

Mads took his time with the berry shit, crushing strawberry after strawberry against my flesh, first my chest, then my chin, then down to my navel, which he tongued madly.

“Ah, Christ, shit, damn, fucking hell I can’t… Ah, Mads, shit, man…”

“Yeah, you’re close,” he mumbled, his fingers working two stout berries into a fine paste. “I want you to hug your knees to your chest, okay?”

He didn’t have to ask twice. Our gazes met and held. “Are you going to lick that off my taint?”

“And a few other places. You’re going to come for me while I do it, and no dick will penetrate any ass.”

I groaned so long and so hard that Mads chuckled. The smile left his face when his fingers found my ass. He worked the berry paste into me in slow, sweet, torturous ways. One finger and then two, in and then out, up over my balls and then back down. His tongue dipped into me, swirled over and around my entrance. His prediction was right. I did come for him as he rimmed me, and all he had had to do was grab my dick and squeeze it hard one time.

“See,” he said as he settled close, the tops of his thighs resting against my ass cheeks, my knees still tight to my chest. “No dick in ass.”

He placed my hand on his cock and showed me how he liked to be worked. I stretched out my legs, hooking them over his shoulders. His gaze locked with mine and he came hard and fast, hot spunk coating my fingers, chest, and stomach. He was beautiful during his orgasm. I could fall in love with him so easily.

“Sweet Jesus,” he panted as I milked him. “You’re such a pretty man.”

He huffed as the afterglow of his release began to settle on his broad back. He dropped to one side, hands fisted on either side of my head, and kissed me sweetly, rolling his tongue over mine in slow, gentle strokes.

“I think I have berries stuck to my back,” I told him as he swung himself from the bed a short while later.

“Yeah, the bed is now a fruit salad,” he replied.

“Ha ha, funny man.”

I stretched like an old cat in a new sunbeam, fingers touching the headboard and toes tickling the footboard. I felt Mads’ eyes on me, so I rolled my hips a bit and got the appreciative groan I’d been hoping for.

 

“I’m going to wash up. Stay put—I’ll bring you a washcloth.”

“Cool.”

Off he went into the master bath. I rolled around for a bit, then jumped up. Yep, there were berries all over the place. On the floor, on the bed. Some had been smashed into the mattress where the sheet had been pulled off. Jared turned the water on in the bathroom. I found the container and started picking up the non-flattened berries from the floor and bedding. His doorbell rang.

“Mads, someone’s at the door. Want me to see who it is?” I shouted, and tossed the berry basket onto the dresser.

“Probably the paper boy. I keep cash on the side table by the front door.” He peeked around the door, soapy washcloth pressed to his chest. “Pay the kid and come back so I can wash the big chunks off your backside.” He waggled a brow, then ducked back into the bathroom.

I found my jeans in record time and hauled them up over my ass. The bell ringing turned into banging.

“Shit, okay, keep your fucking cap on, kid,” I shouted as I jogged and zipped. I dug at a sticky berry that had gotten smashed between my shoulder blades with one hand as I ripped the front door open with my other. “What does he owe you for?”

“Tennant?” Brady asked in a squeaky kind of stunned voice.

Words slammed around inside my skull but none would come out.

“What the fuck is going on here?”

“Ten, did you find the money on the side table?” Mads shouted, then walked out into the living room with a towel tied around his waist. His eyes flared in surprise, but his voice was cool and calm. “Brady.”

“You motherfucker,” Brady snarled.

He threw his overnighter to the floor and went after Mads like an incensed wolf. The two big defensemen collided like a couple of semis. Mads’ bare back slammed against the wall. The portrait of the Madsen family bounced off its nail and hit the floor, the frame breaking, which allowed the glass to fall out. I dove at the two of them, trying to break them up before any of the punches that my fucked-up brother was throwing landed. Too late, sadly. Brady got a clean right hook around Mads’ beefy forearms. The man would have a hell of a shiner tomorrow. I shoved and tugged at Brady, my arm finally snaking around his throat, the only thing that seemingly cut into his rage. Not being able to breathe will cool your ass down. I hung off him like a lemur, the sleeper hold Jamie had taught me all those years ago finally being executed properly.

“Get…off...me,” Brady gasped as we spun around in circles.

We knocked over an end table, broke a lamp, and upended the recliner, but I finally got him away from Mads. I released the sleeper and danced in front of my brother, putting a hand to his heaving chest.

“I will fucking kill you! What are you doing with my little brother?” Brady bellowed around me.

“Hey, asshole, it’s a consensual adult relationship.” I got both hands on his chest, fingers resting on his nice suit jacket, and shoved. Hard. He stumbled back a step or two, gawking at me as if he’d just really seen me for the first time. “I’m twenty-fucking-two years old!”

“And he’s the same age as me!” Brady shouted with a jerky wave at Mads.

“Brady, I know this wasn’t the best way for you to find out, but—” Mads tried to say.

“No! You do not get to talk about this, Mads.” Brady shook a finger at my lover. “You’re supposed to be a friend. Friends don’t fuck other friends’ baby brothers.”

“I’m not your baby brother anymore, Brady. Fuck’s sake, I’m a man!” I shouted as loudly as I could. Hopefully the whole city would hear how tired I was of being thought of as a child all the time by my brothers. “I’m a man who picks who he sleeps with. I picked Mads. Deal or leave, but there will be no more fists.”

The room was as still and silent as outer space. I stood between my older brother and Mads, arms dangling at my sides, muscles coiled in case I had to choke Brady down again. He reached up to rub at his throat.

“Since when are you gay?” Brady asked, his voice softer now, weak, thick with emotion and confusion.

“Since forever.” I glanced back at Mads standing his ground as his left eye watered.

“Jesus, Mom and Dad are going to flip when they find out,” my brother muttered.

“They already know. And they acted way better than you did.”

Brady could not have been more shocked if he’d been holding bare wires in his hands.

“Maybe I should leave you two alone to talk.” Mads slipped around us into the kitchen, probably to find some ice or a bag of frozen peas for that eye.

“You told Mom and Dad before me?” Brady seemed to be genuinely stunned and hurt.

“Well, duh.” That was my reply. Brady’s face screwed up with irritation. “I knew you and Jamie would be assholes when you found out. Well, you’d be an asshole. Jamie would probably just be Jamie.”

His shoulders caved in. “You’re gay. Shit, I never saw it.”

“That’s because you never looked. You were too busy trying to run my fucking life, tell me who to date and what team to play on, how to dress and what music to listen to. Did you ever just once stop trying to be the boss of the world and ask me how I felt about any of the decrees and judgments you passed down from on high?”

He rubbed absently at his throat, his eyes lackluster. “No, I guess I never did.”

“Then why the hell would I have told you? Mom and Dad were cool. Shit, the team is more accepting than you are.”

“The team knows?”

I shrugged. They had to know right? If the captain had figured it out, surely the rest of the team wouldn’t be far behind.

His hand fell from his throat. “They know about you and Mads?”

“No, not that, but they probably all know I’m gay.”

“Christ, you told strangers before you told your own brother?” He sat down hard. Good thing the sofa was behind him, or his ass would have dropped to the floor. “Does Jamie know?”

“I didn’t tell the team and no, I haven’t told Jamie yet. I was going to tell him when we played down in Florida next week.”

“When were you going to tell me?”

I had no answer for that one.

Brady blew out a long breath, and then buried his face in his hands. “You weren’t going to tell me, were you?”

“Eventually, yeah, because I’d have to.” I walked over and picked up the broken picture before someone stepped on the square of glass.

“Christ. Do you hate me that much?”

I glanced over at him from where I was crouching. He’d dropped his hands. His dark eyes were dewy. Shit. Was he going to cry? I put a knee on the floor while hugging the busted frame that had held a nice shot of Mads and Ryker.

“It’s not that I hate you. I mean, you’re my brother… I love you. But you’re such an elitist prick all the time.”

His dark head snapped up at that comment.

“You are. You’ve done nothing but talk down to me about every fucking decision I’ve ever made.” I stood up and placed the broken picture on the end table. Then I righted the recliner.

“I was only trying to make sure you didn’t make stupid mistakes, Tennant.”

“Maybe I need to make those mistakes, Brady.” I sat down in the chair I’d just gotten back on its feet. “Maybe you need to let me make mistakes.”

“But why would you want to screw up your chances of being the next big name in hockey? You’ve got the talent. Way more than Jamie or I could ever hope to have. Why come to Harrisburg? Christ, why hook up with one of your coaches?” He scrubbed at his face with both hands, and then threw a look at me. “When the team finds out about you two, it’s going to be a mess. Why would you choose Mads, of all people?”

“I didn’t choose him, it just happened. Love just happens.”

Okay. Uh wow. Let’s put this buggy into reverse, Tennant. Love? Really? Shit. Yes. Love. All sorts of love.

“I love him.” That sounded funny—wobbly, and kind of shaky—but man did it feel right. “And if we go down in flames because of us, then we go down in flames. I’m willing to take that risk to be with him.”

Brady stared at me forever. “When did you grow up?”

I snorted at the comment. “I’m not sure I have yet, but I’m working on it. But see, I have to do it by myself. I have to make my life decisions. I have to fuck up and I have to figure out how to fix the fuck-ups. You or Jamie can’t do it for me. So back the fuck off and let me live my life. You live yours.”

“I’d say you’ve done a lot of growing up over the past few months,” he murmured, then glanced in the direction where Mads had gone. “Are you sure it has to be Mads?”

“Yep, I am totally positive it has to be Mads.”

“Right. And I need to apologize to him, yeah?”

“Oh hell yeah,” I said, then jerked my head in the direction of the kitchen. “Why don’t you go try to do that? I’ll clean up this mess.”

“You know I boss you around because I love you, right?”

“I know. You can’t help it that you’re an overbearing idiot. Eldest child and all that. Go talk to Mads.”

Brady gathered himself up, unknotted his tie, shoved it into the back pocket of his trousers, and walked into the kitchen to face Mads.

I fell back into the recliner, stared up at the ceiling, and tried to come to grips with the knowledge that I’d fallen insanely in love with Jared Madsen.

 

OceanofPDF.com